Focusing on The Kid

I found this old note during a lecture last week. See the date! The day of V's arrival wasn't far away. I couldn't then focus on studies though I pretended to do that. So, last week I sat on the same lesson, listening to the very same facts as four years earlier and felt like I've never heard any of that before.

Other than that: I am counting days when I am back in Finland again to spend time with my kid.

Weekend Report

Every moment I am closer to the day when I see the kid again.

Fortunately I have been busy doing all kinds of things - mostly studying - and haven't spent unhealthy amounds of time feeling sorry for myself.

On the weekend I had a pleasure to have a dinner with friends every night and I also sat at my friends' gallery both on saturday and on sunday. The weather was quite bad. Only the most dedicated art lovers came to see the exhibition. That was fine with me - I read a book and surfed on the net, which I would do with my spare time anyway.

Identifying

Today I was supposed to do fibre analyses at my school's laboratory. I did try to look like I knew what I was doing and keep busy doing that. I had my eyes glued to a microscope and still I didn't identify a single fibre. Fortunately our teacher told me what I was so desperately looking at. It was cotton.


I am staying at friends'. Here's a picture of their funny dog. One night I found him sleeping next to me, in my bed. He isn't supposed to do that, but he had sneaked quietly in while rest of us were sleeping. So, I don't have to sleep alone after all. I wonder if I should take samples of his fibres and see if can identify them tomorrow?

Ambivalence Again

I arrived to Sweden this morning. The kid slept when I left. I can't say that I am happy about being away from him, but I guess I would be less happy if I didn't do anything to finish my studies.

It's strange to be back in Sweden. It feels like I've returned home, though I don't have a home here (I am at my friends' during my stay). The town looks the same and yet new houses have appeared here and there. Swedish language sounds very familiar and easy to comprehend and still I feel like I can't use it.

The school will start on monday. Before that there should be a strong storm on sunday. They say one shouldn't go out at all. I have been invited to have a dinner with my friends tomorrow. How will I get there if I can't go out?

Terrible Ambivalence

Last week we went to my kid's new day care for "training". That means I went there with the kid, to make the place familiar for him and to make him feel safe in a new place. I can't help being chicken shit about it all, wondering how he will cope with the institutionalizing - I know, I am being dramatic. And I know the kid will find his place there like all the others have done before him and he will learn social skills and even make friends. In many ways it will be good for him, but the start will be hard for everyone.

Next week we'll train again and week after that begins the hardcore adjusting period with day care every day and an absent mom. Yes, I am leaving for Sweden in a week and yes I am feeling pretty awful because of that. And at the same time I am thrilled to get back to my studies.

What are you reading?

Now that I am sighting an english book I am back to this important issue.

1. Take the nearest book and go to page 123.
2. Go to the fifth sentence of the page.
3. Copy down the next three sentences and tag three people.

1 bird in a cage
6 pink ribbons
3 cats
2 parasols
10 yellow ribbons

Unfortunately there weren't any sentences to copy in the nearest book, but these wonderful lines are from "The Usborne Big Book of Things to Spot". Vimme inherited the book from friends who left Japan long before us and he liked the book so much that we took it with us to Finland.

2007

Happy New Year people! A year of Pig has started. I wish it will be satisfying, prosperous, and full of right decisions for everyone.